tired...but thankful thursday...

Whew...you all...I am tired.  This has been a crazy busy week and I am running on empty. I can't even think straight, so I'm not sure this post will entirely make sense but I'm going to try.  I think my thankful post is going to be mostly pictures this week with a few words thrown in.  Enjoy!

First of all I am thankful for my in-laws for not hating us for waking them up at 1am after our power went out and we got locked out of our house.  And for letting us sleep at their house for a few hours. I am also thankful for...

  these people every single day

 my beautiful babies

 Brianna had such a great 6th birthday

the sweet friends my baby girl has

i turned around and you were six...

Dear Brianna,
I start thinking about these letters to you months before your birthday.  I write and rewrite posts in my head and when I finally sit down at my computer to type it out I am at a loss for words.  I have so much I want to say to you, but no words ever seem adequate.  You are one of the greatest joys of my life.  Being your mommy has fulfilled a dream that I have had since I was very young.  Your smile lights up a room and I cannot help but smile when you laugh.  You are sweet and kind and love your friends and family fiercely.  It is truly a joy to be your mommy.  That is not to say being your mommy has been all sunshine and roses...oh no my dear, you and I...we are the same, so we butt heads and are quick to anger at the same things.  We also have the same heart, one that can get bruised easily but one that loves big.   It is all going so fast. My tiny little baby girl is turning into an amazing young lady right before my eyes.  My sweet baby girl, I hope 6 is everything you want it to be.  I know this year will bring so many changes for you and so far you are handling them all with the grace that I knew you would have.  I know this year will bring you more independence and in some ways a little farther away from being my little girl, but know that I am always here and you are never too big to be wrapped in mommy's arms.

I love you my beautiful girl.  Happy, Happy 6th Birthday.
Love always,
Mommy

a hidden witch...

A few months ago I was selected to receive a great book A Modern Witch, I reviewed it here. As a thank you for reviewing A Modern Witch the author, Debora Geary, sent her reviewers a copy of the next book in the series, A Hidden Witch.  The email with the book came at such a perfect time, it really made my day, I was so excited.  I have to say, it didn't disappoint, evidenced by the fact that I read it in one sitting.  All of our favorite witches were back with the introductions to some new characters.  I think one of the things I love most about The Modern Witch series is that I fall in love with the characters, I feel for them and with them you are definitely along for the ride when you read this book. 

Elorie is a woman who was born into a witch family and wished to be a witch throughout her whole life. When it became apparent that Elorie didn't have powers she was devastated, but took to a different role so she could still support the witching community she loved.  She has accepted her place in the witching community and has come to terms with the fact that she doesn't have powers...or does she?  After a scan, developed by a young witchling and her 2 sisters,  reveals some magical powers in Elorie the entire witching community comes together to figure out exactly what kind of powers Elorie has and how best to use them.  Another wonderful story of a family's love, empathy and humor helping them through even the toughest of situations.  I loved every page of this book and cannot wait to see what happens next!

For those of you who don't have ereaders...you are in luck...A Modern Witch is available in paperback on Amazon and A Hidden Witch will be available in a few weeks!

Source Disclosure: I received A Hidden Witch from the author but the opinions of this book are all my own!

thankful thursday(the random edition)...

So, today my thankful post is going to be a little on the "I'm thankful for the small things that make me smile" side.  I am always of course thankful for the big things, but sometimes it is the little things that can make your day...so here is mine today.

• ELECTRICITY...we were without power for 12 hours.  Thankfully, a chunk of that time was while we were sleeping but the natives were getting restless.  I felt so disconnected. 
• The people who worked hard to get our electricity back on.
• Saving $4 on a pair of shoes that I bought for Brianna.
• A great book given to me by the author (review coming tomorrow!)

I know these storms have been hard on so many people, I hope and pray that everyone stays safe!

new stuff at links of love...

For those of you who don't keep up with me over at links of love (although there hasn't been much to keep up with these days) there is a new post up!  But for those of you that don't want to click over, here is the gist of the post.  I have tried my hand at making watches and I'm fairly pleased with the results.  Happy Tuesday all!

my girl...

Today Bob took Bryce to the Illinois Open to watch Brian play so Brianna and I had the afternoon to ourselves.  (Side note...apparently Bryce was amazingly well behaved at the course and quiet and listened well...the kid has a serious love of golf already.  It is all he has talked about since being home).  Anyway, Brianna's birthday is next week and since we are moving soon, her two little friends from daycare/preschool are coming over Monday night for a sleepover and then Tuesday we're taking the girls to the mall to have their hair, nails and makeup done at a little girl's party place, then I had the bright idea to take the three girls and have their picture taken together all dolled up.  Of course I am me, so I decided they needed matching outfits so I decided to make them tutus.  (wow, I went off on a little tangent here).  All of this to say that we headed out this afternoon to get supplies for the tutus and also shoe shopping for the wedding we are going to this weekend (both of us needed shoes).  It was so fun shoe shopping with her, she definitely has an opinion about what she likes and doesn't and having conversations with her now it so fun.  As I said on facebook tonight, having a girl certainly brings a lot of drama to life, but days like today make all of it worth while.  I know Brianna and I will certainly butt heads in the future, but hopefully there are also many more days like today in our future. 

4th of july (catch up post!)...

We spent the 4th of July weekend at our friend's house in Milwaukee.  It is a tradition to go up there the weekend of the 4th, and this is the first time we've taken the kids.  While we were there, our friend's baby was baptised and we were lucky enough to be able to witness it.  The kids are in love with Ben, Amanda and especially baby Molly (or Maui as Bryce calls her).  We all had such a good time hanging out with friends and being together.  We're grateful that Ben & Amanda keep letting us come back! :)  Here are a few pictures from baptism.

much needed family time...

Sorry I missed you last week, but we were out having a long family weekend. Last Thursday the four of us spent the day at the waterpark with my sister, brother-in-law, and two nephews. We had a great time, even though it was pretty crowded. I think the lazy river was everyone's favorite :). After the waterpark we headed to Wisconsin to Bob's family's lake house. We spent the next 3 days there. Mom and Dad joined us at the lake and we had a few days to just relax, play in the water and spend time together. We also had a small, and very early, birthday party for Brianna. Everyone's schedules are so insane this summer we weren't sure when we'd be able to do it otherwise, so we celebrated her birthday with my family (and Bob's parents) at the lake. Unfortunately, because we decided to do it at the last minute, I didn't make her a cake, but be on the lookout for one when her actual birthday approaches! Overall it was such a great weekend and went by too fast. 

thankful...part 2...

Seriously...how can you not be thankful when you get to see stuff like this everyday?  Makes me know everything will be just fine as long as we're together.

the big thankful post...

Most of you know that this year has not been easy, our house still hasn't sold and we're (the kids and I) are moving to Iowa without Bob in a few weeks so Brianna can start school.  I don't know that I will ever look back on this year (at least the first half...hopefully the second half redeems itself) and think that this was a great year.  It has been hard, much harder than we thought, and stressful...and to be completely honest, this house selling hasn't brought out the best in me.  I truly feel like we're doing the right thing for our family by moving, but after hitting roadblock after roadblock the doubt is definitely creeping in.  This wasn't the way it was supposed to go...but, this is the way it is going and we are dealing with it the best way we can. That brings me to my thankful...As tough as these last six-ish months have been....there is no way we could have made it through without our friends and family.  They are always ready with encouraging words and even just an ear to listen when we need to let out our frustrations.  They are all the best.  And for me personally, I am so very thankful for Bob.  He works so hard for all of us and keeps me sane (well as sane as I ever get), he makes me laugh when I want to cry, and is just there for me always.  So, through it all...I'm still so very thankful.AND...I get to spend the weekend with some of my very favorite people in the world so I'm very thankful for that as well! :)

a lucky girl...

I am lucky enough to be surrounded by so many amazing women in my life...friends, aunts, grandmas, cousins, sister, mom, mother-in-law, (soon to be) sister-in-law.  I know how wonderful it is to have these  women in my life.  But there are three such women who have made such an impact on my life, they have helped me become who I am, and show me the kind of mom, sister, friend I want to be.  This past weekend I was lucky enough to get to spend a long weekend with these women...my mom, sister and cousin.  We took a little trip to Nashville over the weekend and I for one had an amazing time.  So much laughter and smiling (the drinks and fantastic music didn't hurt either!).  It was just what this girl needed.  I hope you are all as lucky as I am to have such incredible people in your life.  So, this Thankful Thursday I am thankful for all of the amazing women in my life, but especially for these 3.  Love you girls!

(mostly) wordless wednesday...

I know I have shared these pictures with pretty much everyone who reads here...but if by chance you have missed them, I'm sharing them here. These pictures are making me super happy this week!

short and sweet...

Today I am so thankful that as you are reading this I am on my way to Nashville for a long weekend with my mom and my 2 sisters (my actual sister and my cousin who might as well be my sister).  This trip could not have come at a better time...I'm in serious need of some downtime to rejuvenate and gear up for the rest of the summer.  I'm so thankful that I'm blessed with family that I love to spend time with and who put up with me when I'm complaining (which seems to be happening a lot lately).  I'm also extremely thankful for my in-laws who are taking care of the kiddos so that I can take this trip, I wouldn't be able to go without them! 
Have a great weekend everyone!!

Watch out Nashville...here we come!! 

oldie but goodie...

I just ran across this video and it cracked me up.  Can you believe these two are starting kindergarten soon?  They are such babies in this video!

i've been dreaming of cake...

A few months ago my cousin asked if I would want to make her cake for graduation.  Knowing I was completely over my head...I of course said yes! :)  After months of thinking about what to do, having a complete idea and then scrapping it and starting over, I was still a bit unsure as to what I was going to do.  Well, last weekend was the party, so after 10 cakes, around 14 pounds of powdered sugar and about 5 pounds of butter, (it was a large graduation party)here are the final results.  They are by far the biggest cakes I've done (and seen by the most people) but overall I'm fairly happy with how they turned out.  I didn't eat any cake, but I did hear that it tasted good, so I guess it was a win! 

Happy Monday everyone!!

thankful, thankful...

I know...I missed last Thursday.  I have no excuse other than I had a very rough day and I wasn't feeling very thankful.  Although thinking about that, writing this post was probably exactly what I needed.  Anyway, I didn't want you all to feel neglected so I'm going to write a quick thankful post and get back to my baking.  I am so so thankful these last couple of weeks for my family (both by blood and by marriage) for their love and support and for listening to me complain.  To Bob for all the little things he does, like bringing me ice cream when I had a bad day or putting an umbrella in my car when there is rain in the forecast.  For the kids who make me laugh and remind me to take some time to be carefree and have fun. Lastly, for my amazing friends who are always there for me,who can make me smile when I'm down and just listening and loving me for me (bad parts and all). 

We are in Iowa for the next few days so maybe (don't hold your breath though) I may have some new pictures for you after the weekend.  I'm looking forward to seeing a bunch of family this weekend, just what the doctor ordered! 

Have a great rest of the week/weekend all!  Hope you all find some time to be thankful for all of your blessings!

monday smiles...

I think this video will always make me smile!

sunday thoughts...

Today started out rough, the kids were crabby and didn't want to get ready for church and I lost my patience when they complained about the clothes or shoes I picked out.  We finally got out the door and I was still upset sitting in church (which makes it lose all meaning for me) but then Bryce fell asleep on me and looking at him so peaceful I felt the peace as well.  It is pretty well known that I don't sleep well and I worry A LOT...but today during church they sang one of my favorite songs.  The refrain is this "Be not afraid, I go before you always...come follow me, and I will give you rest."  When I first heard it today I thought of the sleeping boy in my arms and the smiling girl sitting beside me that I would always be there for them and I don't want them to be afraid and then it struck me.  This is exactly what I needed to hear.  I am doing everything in my power to do the best I can for my family, and now I just need to follow Him and have faith.  Suddenly when I realized this, this feeling of relief and peace washed over me.  I will continue to do the best I can for those I love, but I will also trust that He will lead me in the right direction, it is my job to follow where He leads.  Each day of our lives is such a gift and we need to treat it as such. Enjoy this beautiful day!

at least i show up once a week...

I've just been stuck in my blogging lately...things I want to write about but don't feel comfortable writing about because they are deeply personal and are not just about myself.  Things are stressful, selling a house is stressful, making back-up plans to separate your family (because of the house...even if it is good in the long run) for the short term is stressful, job hunting is hard.  Things are just...hard.  But today...TODAY is a good day.  Not that it hasn't had its bumps, I lost my temper, kids didn't listen, but overall it has been a good day.  The kids slept in a bit, we had 2 full hours outside this morning, riding bikes, swinging and hitting golf balls in the yard.  Everything just felt right.  I am trying to enjoy these days...the days I get to play in the yard with the kids while everyone is at work and school, where things are quiet and all I hear are birds chirping and kids laughing.  It fills up my soul and makes me believe in my heart things will be right and while they are hard and may be hard for a while...there is a purpose, and that purpose is worth all the hard times.
Today I am thankful for this

These two beautiful children who occasionally drive me to the brink of insanity, always bring me back and show me what happiness is truly about.

Thanks again to Jean for her Thankful Thursday contribution...
For little Elliott- taking some feeds from a bottle, growing, and getting closer and closer to coming to Dubuque.
For my children, who at the ages they are still surprise me.(in a good way)
For a sister that listens, but doesn't judge me.
A newly mowed lawn-even if it only lasts for a little while

If you'd like to let us know what you're thankful for...leave a comment!
Happy Thursday everyone!

it is the little things...

Man, 6 days without a post.  I'm afraid as our hectic summer approaches the posts are going to get pretty sparse, but I will do my best to continue to write here.  There is not much and also so much going on here right now.  I'm starting my job hunt...the goal is to be back to work full time by this fall...I'm not good at looking for a job, I don't like it.  I'm not good at selling myself on paper, I do better by just showing people what I can do and working hard. I've been (mostly) out of the game for 2 1/2 years...it makes me nervous to start again.  I have faith that I'll be lead in the right path if I do the legwork and get my resume out there.  If you are aware of any bookkeeping/accounting jobs open in the Cascade, IA (or surrounding area) drop me an email...I'll send you some cookies or something! 

Since it is Thursday...here is what I'm thankful for...
a husband who put an umbrella in my car yesterday
watching the kids do the "we did it!" dance from Dora
the kids cheering for daddy at his softball game
watching American Idol as a family
a long weekend with few plans

Thanks to my Aunt Jean who is doing Thankful Thursday with me!  She posted this on my facebook wall this morning:
Amber, here it is Thursday, thankful Thursday, thankful the rain stop(for a little while), Elliott weighs 5lbs 20z, a husband that's been very understanding lately, and my family(some of which I don't know what I would do if I didn't have them)

If you'd like to join us post to your blog, facebook, or if you don't use either of those...email me and I'll post them here!  If you blog or post to facebook leave a comment so I can come check out what you are thankful for!

Have a beautiful and thankful day!

relay for life in missouri...

I guess I need to back up a couple weeks to tell you about the Relay for Life I (well the whole family was there for part of it) did in Missouri with my sister.  We drove down on Friday morning and Angie helped me finish up my contribution to the team (I made scrabble tile pendants to sell...if anyone is interested there are still some left, they are $5 and the entire $5 goes to the American Cancer Society...there are two different styles, but they are at Angie's house so maybe she could take a picture for me :) ANYWAY, we headed over to set up the campsite about 4 and hung out until the start of the relay.  The weather was a little sketchy (rainy and windy) but we survived and even got some walking in! :)  We stayed awake all night (although it was touch and go for me for a little bit).  We got a few hours of sleep after we got back to Angie and Nick's house and spent the rest of the day playing outside with the kids.  It was a great weekend visit, I always love spending time with my sister and her family.
Here are the kids enjoying the relay!

wrap up on the thankful project...

I may not get to things right away...but I will get to them eventually...

The thankful project really changed the way I approached my days, I paid attention to the little things that made me happy throughout the day and I really took them in so I could remember them at the end of the day (my memory is not the best these days).  The bad seemed to be less because I was more consciously thinking of the good.  I can honestly say it made me more present in my day.  It also got me doing more things to influence my day into being a good one with lots of thankful moments. Lately, I know my posts haven't been the most upbeat or thankful, but please know that writing is my outlet for my frustrations, I haven't lost sight of the big picture...things are definitely in perspective.  I have a wonderful family, we are all healthy, we have a roof over our head and food on our table...it is enough and I am truly grateful.  I mean seriously, how lucky can a girl be?

I am thankful to you all for taking this journey with me...and maybe I'll be back with some more thankful thoughts from time to time...maybe a "thankful Thursday" type of thing?  Would anyone be willing to join me in doing "thankful Thursday" posts?

slacker...

**I apologize for the randomness of this post in advance it is just kind of a mind dump for me this morning!**

Good grief!  I've been gone a while huh?  Life has been crazy and stressful, and to be quiet honest...I'm not handling it all that well.  We've had a run of bad luck...nothing major...just a laptop crash (good part...I was able to save all my emails, documents, etc) and a spare tire falling off the truck in front of me that then bounced up into the front of my car.  No damage done to the car really...just took about 10 years off my life.  On top of that, we've had little to no activity on the house.  Like I said...I'm not dealing very well.  I've been busying myself by reading and hiding out at home.  Thankfully I have a lot to read thanks to Librarything.  I've won about 13 books in the last month.  I right now have 6 to be read and reviewed and 3 that I haven't received yet.  No complaining here thought, free books are awesome, I'm reading things I probably normally wouldn't, it is good all around.  In the middle of all of that we are potty training the little man (with little success). We took him to the bathroom every 45 min for 2 whole days and we had only 2 (mildly) successful trips.  Today I'm taking him every 30 minutes and we'll see how that goes.  One successful trip so far, we'll see how long that lasts. 
Other than the above we don't have much going on(right now)....we're gearing up for a crazy busy summer that (so far) doesn't include moving, but we are hopeful that we'll have to squeeze that in there as well!  I'm baking/decorating a cake for my cousin's graduation party (yikes...I'm scared...but also really excited!) and my mom, sister and I are taking a trip to Nashville (sooo excited) and we are taking a family (my mom/dad and sister and her family) trip to a waterpark and then to Powers Lake for a few days.  I'm beyond excited about spending some real time with my family without having 1,000 obligations to attend to while we're together.  We also have a couple of canoe trips and some other fun stuff going on this summer...including all the pre-wedding festivities for Bob's cousin and also his brother !  So, much fun and excitement also leads to some stress about how everything will get done, but I'm sure it will, it always seems to. 
Oh...and one last thing before I go...I found this recipe for a copycat black tie mousse from the Olive Garden (our favorite dessert) a while ago and have been itching to try it but was leery about the time commitment to it.  So, yesterday, as a belated anniversary present to Bob (and me too!) I decided it was time and tried it.  I will admit it isn't exactly like Olive Garden Black Tie Mousse, BUT it is pretty darn close.  The only thing to me that didn't really taste the same was the bottom cake part, it could be due to the fact I didn't have Dutch cocoa, but who knows...it is still pretty darn good!  Here is the recipe in case anyone else wants to try it :) Big thanks to Pattie Kaykes and Meemo's Kitchen for the amazing recipe!
Here is a picture of the finished product (I would have decorated it better but I was tired by the time I got to this point and didn't want to get out a pastry bag and decorating tips so I just used a ziplock with a hole cut in it also this is a cell phone picture so it isn't the best quality). 

eight...

Dear Bob,
Eight years ago today I thought I was living the best day of my life.  It was picture perfect and I was never happier than I was that day, it was everything I dreamed and imagined.  Actually, I take that back...it was better than anything I had ever dreamed, because the reality had you.  Standing in front of our friends and family I promised to love you in good times and bad (we have definitely had both), for richer and poorer (check!), in sickness and in health (thankfully we've been blessed so far).  I mean them today as much, if not more than I did eight years ago.  You are my best friend, my biggest fan, my strength when I feel like things are crumbling around me.  You are an amazing dad...the kids light up around you.  I know that living with me is sometimes impossible horrible a challenge, but you handle it so well.  I cannot (nor do I want to) imagine life without you.  I look around this life we have created these last eight years and although it hasn't always been sunshine and rainbows, we have had more laughter and smiles than tears.  There is no one I'd rather go through the ups and downs with and truthfully, I know that I wouldn't have made it through without you. I wish I could find the adequate words to tell you how much you mean to me (in case you don't already know).  But all I have are these...eight years ago I thought I was living the best day of my life, but I was wrong...because every day with you is better than the one before.  Each day of my life with you is the best day...you have made (and continue to make) all of this girl's dreams come true .
Happy Anniversary!
I love you!
Love,
me

unintended blogging hiatus...over...

Oh you amazing blog readers, I'm sorry I unintentionally abandoned you after you read all my days of giving thanks.  I am supremely thankful for each of you that visits here, reads my words, comment, and just join in my world in some small part.  Easter was crazy, but so so fun.  We had an amazing time in Iowa, we attended an Easter egg hunt in Cascade Saturday morning where my hilarious little boy proceeded to pick up one egg put it in his basket, hand the basket to me and ran off to play on the playground.  It made me laugh that he didn't care about the eggs or candy, he just wanted to PLAY! The kids had a great time and came away with a haul of candy.  We colored eggs at mom and dad's and my cousin Audrey and her daughters came out to join in the fun.  The egg coloring was fairly uneventful, except that Bryce decided to take a big spoonful of the die and drink it.  He said it was yucky and went on coloring eggs.  That kid!  Easter itself was really fun and we got to spend time with both of my grandmas (always a treat).  We didn't get home until midnight.  It was a looong day, but so worth it.  Last week was a little crazy, I had jury duty on Tuesday (didn't get picked for a trial) but spend most of the day downtown sitting, reading and waiting.  I got dismissed about 2:30pm and decided to head to my Tuesday job.  So that was a long day too.  The rest of the week was fairly tame, but it still didn't seem like I had any time to do anything.  This past weekend Bob had a softball tournament both days so the kids and I chilled out at home and I made Bob's birthday cake.  Yesterday my Aunt and Uncle (Cathy & Greg) and their kids (Tyler, Justin, and Nicole) came to visit on their way home from Indianapolis.  They stuck around for a while today and we spent all day outside at parks and playing in the yard.  The kids are wore out (so is mommy).  Bryce was sleeping before 7pm (that is tired for that boy).  And even though I have a crazy busy rest of the week with 1 million things I need to get done I am sitting here doing nothing (Bob is playing softball).  Maybe I'll get some ambition to do something a little later, but we'll see.  I got the house picked up and the kitchen cleaned, so I'm calling that a success!  Hope you all had a great Easter and I'll be back soon with pictures!

(Abbie, I saw your comment and want to post about it, I just can't think very clearly tonight...I will get back to your question...I promise! :)

days 37 through 39...

I'm coming to the end of my Lenten project of recording things I'm thankful for and I'm slacking on my last few days.  I have no good excuse for being three days behind, I just am.  I'm excited to be going to see family this weekend to celebrate Easter, we've been home for the last 3 weekends (which is so unlike us) so it is time for a little trip away.  I of course have a page long list of things I need to get packed and get ready, but in true Amber fashion I am procrastinating  and probably won't do it until tomorrow.  Bob had softball tonight so it has been just me and the kids all day, and while they have been pretty good (and even went to bed fairly easily tonight) I just have no energy to do anything extra.  Normally I'd have the dishes done and laundry put away but instead I'm sitting on the couch writing a blog post, watching a rerun of Grey's and reading a book (well not simultaneously...but you know).  Anyway, enough rambling...I'm hoping to have some pictures soon, I haven't taken my camera out for a long time, but this weekend...I promise!  Here is my thankful list for the last 3 days. 

day 37 (Tuesday 4/19)...

• no bedtime fights
• catching up on DVR
• leftovers for dinner (so I didn't have to cook)
• a short day at work
• a quiet night at home with the hubby

day 38 (Wednesday 4/20)...

• wearing a new dress (trying to will it to be spring)
• kids in good moods when I picked them up
• kids belly laughs while playing
• getting an advance reader copy of a book in the mail
• pizza for dinner (I didn't have to cook! I really like to cook normally, I just wasn't into it this week)

day 39 (Thursday 4/21)...

• a night with no bedtime fight
• watching American Idol with my girl
• kids picking up the toys without me yelling
• a long nap from Bryce
• a dinner with everyone ate and no one complained about (YAY!)

36 days and counting...

We've been struggling with sleep around here lately.  Bryce is still awake right now (and it has been at least this late for the last week or so) and he'll be up by 6 in the morning.  He's even cutting his naps from a normal 3ish  hours a day to 1 or less.  I don't know what to do.  I'm sure part of the struggle at night is that we have never really established a bedtime routine, but there has to be more to it than that.  Bryce has been out of his crib for a while and he can take down the gate himself...so we have no way to keep him in his room, he is a stubborn, stubborn boy!  Onto my thankful list for the day and then off to bed. 

• hearing the kids laugh while playing with daddy
• that everyone was happy with leftovers tonight so I didn't have to cook
• the cute smile Bryce has and the way he can make me smile even when I'm upset with him
• the sweet girl Brianna is
• how funny the kids are...they always keep me laughing just when I need it most

thankful day 35...

Whew...Sunday night already.  It was a good, quiet weekend and after the week we had it was much needed.  I'm trying to get mentally prepared for the week ahead but the impending weather (read: expected snow) is really bumming me out.  Although I'm completely looking forward to family time this coming weekend for Easter!  I know at some point I need to get back to writing about more than the things I'm thankful for but for now, that is about the extent of the thoughts I can put together.  So, to end my weekend, I give thanks...

• planning a weekend get-away with my mom and sister
• librarything and its member giveaways (I've won 6 ebooks over the last month...yay for free books!)
• a clean kitchen so I can go to bed guilt free and not have to deal with it in the morning
• a fairly calm week ahead (at least as far as I can see!)
• a weekend with lots of good family time and lots of smiles and laughs

I hope you all have a great week ahead and take the time to think about the things you are thankful for...it really does change your perspective on things. Much love.

day 34...

Today was a great day (aside from the weather...what the heck....isn't it supposed to be spring??  Did Mother Nature not get the memo?).  Everyone in this house is in some stage of illness, it stinks.  Bob went to the doctor today and is now on antibiotics, Brianna is still battling her cold, Bryce I think is finally on the upswing of his croup/cough/wheezing and I woke up with a sore throat.  Needless to say it was a good day to stay inside and try to recuperate!  All things considered though it was a really good day at home with the family!

• a game of candyland
• a game of chutes and ladders
• chili and fresh baked bread (the good thing that came out of this yucky weather!)
• a family movie with a bowl of popcorn
• a good book

day 32 and 33...

I am seriously still trying to get back on track from this week.  It is amazing how easily I get derailed.  So, here is a quick list of the things I'm thankful for.

• Bob and Nancy for taking Brianna on Wednesday and bringing her home yesterday
• a good nap from Bryce today
• it is finally Friday
• a chance to sleep in tomorrow morning
• a weekend with no real plans
• Bryce is feeling better and coughing a lot less
• Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows (part 1) out today
• April 15th is just another day for me (instead of it being a big deal..tax day)
• 2 canoe trips scheduled for this summer...dates are on the calendar
• kids tucked away in bed

day 30 and 31 (hospital version)

The last 2 days have been a complete mishmash of time.  I've slept for about 4 hours in the past 48, spent 5 hours in the ER and 8ish hours at the hospital pediatric short stay with Bryce.  I am tired, my brain is mush, but I am thankful my baby is feeling better (honestly you'd never know he had just gotten out of the hospital the way he is bouncing around here.  Mommy feels like the walking dead and he acts like he could run a marathon...go figure!)  The long and short of it is this...The kids were at Bob and Nancy’s yesterday because I had to work and they usually stay Tuesday night because I work Wednesday morning at a different job.  Bob and Nancy called to say that Bryce had started croupy coughing and asked if we could meet them to drop off the nebulizer.  Bob and I were eating dinner when they called again to say that Bryce was coughing a lot and was pretty miserable so we decided to pick the kids up and bring them home and I would stay home from work today.  We got him home, sat in the steam with him and gave him a nebulizer treatment.  He sounded pretty bad and we had already scheduled a doctors appointment for this morning so he fell asleep and we were just going to wait it out until morning.  He woke up about 11:00 and sounded much worse so we decided to take him to the ER.  I got to the ER and the lady behind the desk was doing something and then she stopped mid-sentence, looked at me and said “is that him?” she could hear him breathing from about 15 feet away.  His oxygen level and his heart rate were fine but he sounded awful, we were back in a room pretty much immediately after his name was entered into the computer.  We didn’t even sit in a waiting room.  He had 2 doses of steroids via nebulizer (not sure what they both were but one was basically adrenaline), an oral steroid, a chest x-ray, and a cool mist treatment.  About 3am they decided they were going to admit him for observation.  About 5am we got up to a room on the pediatric short stay floor.  The ER doctor told us we’d probably be home before lunch, the pediatrician on the floor said we’d probably be home mid-afternoon and the next doctor said we should probably be discharged today and shouldn’t probably have to stay overnight.  We ended up being discharged at 1:30 this afternoon.  Bryce is doing much better and running around like a crazy person.

So with that...my thankful list for the last 2 days!

day 30

• a productive day at work
• dinner out with my hubby
• in-laws bringing our sick kid home
• employer who is sweet and understanding that my kids always come first
• prompt attention in the ER

day 31

• an amazing ER nurse named Kevin
• an equally amazing respiratory therapist named Megan
• Deanna a sweet nurse in the pediatric short stay floor
• the overall amazing care Bryce was given
• to be home and able to sleep in my own bed tonight (hopefully)

On that note I think it is about time for this mama to head to bed. 

day 29...

It has been a long day, due to the fact that the kids got up super early and I got only about 4 hours of sleep last night...yuck.  But it has had some redeeming qualities. I hope you are all feeling as blessed and thankful tonight as I am.

• monthly work is done and billed, it is always nice to have that done
• the kids played together nicely all morning so I could finish my work
• for my mother-in-law, Nancy (Happy Birthday!)
• a family walk after dinner
• a stop at the park during the walk that didn't end up in whining or crying when it was time to leave

It truly is the little things in life that get you through.

sunday thanks (day 28)...

It was a gorgeous day out today.  We spend a good part of the morning outside, the kids riding bikes and driving the jeep, Bob working and me laying in the grass reading.  Pretty much my idea of a perfect Sunday.
We had a good weekend at home and I'm sad to see another weekend come to an end.  In addition to helping me appreciate the good things in life this little project has also helped me write (almost) everyday.  I guess I just need a "fall-back" project on those occasions where I can't think of anything to write, then maybe I won't go weeks without updating.  Without further ado, here are my Sunday thanks...

1. more beautiful weather to be outside, it just improves my mood tenfold
2. the guilt free clothes shopping I got to do thanks to a gift card for my birthday (thanks Bob and Nancy)
3. the little bit of additional shopping I did with only a little guilt :)
4. a project that I am doing and sending to my little cousin at her school
5. a Sunday at home with my family

On an additional note...the niece of a dear friend of mine was born today at 28 weeks.  Please keep their entire family in your prayers so that this sweet little girl stays strong and thrives and is home where she belongs as soon as possible.

thankful day 27...

It is way past my bedtime so short and sweet tonight.

1. when Bryce gets his cup out of the refrigerator he ALWAYS gets Brianna's hers as well and takes it to her
2. 2 showings today
3. a fun couple of hours spent at the library during said showings
4. a beautiful day to play outside
5. a family dinner (with the Carroll clan) and a fun (albeit chaotic) game of LIFE

thankful day 26...

Today (Friday) was a rough day...I struggled...I was angry...I was tired....but in the end I was also thankful.

1. watching Bryce do the "we did it" dance (the song at the end of Dora) HILARIOUS!
2. kids playing together (seriously is there anything that makes a mom happier than her kids playing together nicely?)
3. naptime (even though it was only an hour)
4. winning 3 ebooks in a giveaway
5. a bowl of icecream and a book to finish out the day

thankful day 25...

Are you all tired of my thankful posts yet?  :)  I will admit some days I have a hard time thinking of things to be thankful for, not because I don't have a lot to be thankful for but because my memory is not very good and by the end of the day pretty much stops working altogether.  I really just need to write things down throughout the day but..um...remember what I said about my memory...yeah it doesn't work much during the day either!  I realize some of the things I'm thankful for each day seem trivial and even silly, but I am trying very hard to appreciate the little things.  This wouldn't be a very effective project if everyday I said I was thankful for my family, our health, the roof over our head, our friends and the food on our table.  Don't get me wrong...I am so very thankful for those things and they are the things that I thank God for everyday.  So, this project is mostly about things that make me smile throughout the day or make my life a tiny bit easier.  (I'm not sure I really had to explain all of that but I guess I just wanted to write more than my list today!)  Without further ado...

1. my wireless on my computer has been working lately (it makes life just a little bit easier)
2. bryce stayed in bed when I put him to bed last night (although he didn't go to sleep until 2 hrs later)
3. taco night (there is never a fight about eating when it is taco night)
4. 3 house showings this week!
5. thunderstorms (I love thunderstorms and it is a telltale sign of spring for me)

thankful day 24 (in pictures...and maybe a few words)...

It has been a while since I've put up any pictures so I thought I'd do my thankful post tonight in pictures. (sorry they aren't the greatest photos, but hopefully they are good enough to convey why I'm thankful).

 beautiful birthday flowers

 yummy birthday cheesecake (we finally got to eat)

a new book

 sleeping beauty

  a not so sleeping prince

thankful day 23...

1. that my in-laws could take the kids early today so I could rest and try to kick this bug
2. that my employer is flexible and is letting me switch my day this week
3. that I was sick and home so I could quickly pick up the house for a showing today
4. that I got 2 uninterrupted hours to read at the library today
5. that I am feeling just about back to normal

thankful day 22 (the birthday edition...a day late)...

My thankful post for yesterday got sidelined because I somehow managed to pick up a stomach bug and spent the good part of my birthday laying on the couch willing myself not to get sick and praying for the moment when Bob got home from work.  Not exactly how I wanted the day to go.  But, even with the illness I am still so extrememly thankful for so many things...here are my top 5 for yesterday.

1. coming down the stairs and hearing Bryce say "MOMMY...IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY!!"
2. the kids snuggling and cuddling with me throughout the day
3. my thoughtful daughter who drug her daddy out because she wanted to get me a special present
4. my wonderful husband who got me chicken noodle soup (even if I didn't eat it until today)
5. that God has truly blessed my 31 years on this earth

thankful day 21...

1. Bryce twirling my hair while laying by me this morning
2. the kids coloring at the table while we make out our meal and grocery lists
3. having a meal plan for the rest of the month
4. Bob grocery shopping
5. a nap

thankful day 20...

1. fairly well behaved kids at a birthday party
2. watching a movie with Brianna
3. hearing Brianna giggle (it is impossible not to smile)
4. watching Brianna hold her brother's hand and help him during the birthday party
5. my wireless is working on my computer again (for now :))

thankful day 19...

1. family movie night
2. watching the kids play wii together today
3. getting to bed early tonight
4. the weekend being here
5. my nice, warm, comfy bed (can you tell I'm tired tonight?)

a modern witch...

Lauren is a successful realtor in Chicago and is living a pretty calm and normal life until one day she is online ordering groceries and gets pulled into a chat room for witches.  Amused, although admittedly a little unnerved by this turn of events Lauren chalks the whole experience up to a strange fluke on the web.  Little does she know this encounter in the chat room will soon change her life forever.  A Modern Witch is a sweet, funny and heartfelt story of modern day witches.  I completely enjoyed this book (evidenced by the fact that I had to force myself to stop reading at 2am this morning, which I only fleetingly regretted as one kid was up at 5:30)  Check it out!

I received A Modern Witch by Debora Geary as a LibraryThing Member Giveaway.

jackson's toy story cake...

For those of you that didn't see this on facebook or in other pictures.  Here is Jackson's birthday cake.  Angie helped with the blocks (she did a great job and she now thinks I'm even crazier for thinking it is fun to decorate cakes) and I sculpted the figurines (except for Buzz and Woody)  My sculpting still needs some work but I really like the way Hamm turned out!

thankful day(s) 17 &18 and other randomness...

It really shouldn't be that hard to post everyday should it?  Lots of people do it...but for some reason I have a really hard time...guess it is my lack of discipline!  (or really by the time I sit down to write I am tired and/or hurried.)  ANYWAY, enough about all of that.  I don't have much new or exciting going on.  Our house has been on the market for a month now, we've had around 8 showings and our realtor tells us there are a couple of parties interested but no one is ready to "pull the trigger" yet.  This house selling stuff is definitely a huge test of patience on my part, but I know it will happen when the time is right.  Thanks to all of you who are thinking good thoughts for us...we appreciate it more than you know! 
(switching subjects entirely now)
Last week Bob gave me my birthday present (a little early so I could take it with me last weekend).  I am the proud owner of a nookcolor!  All of the begging, annoying, talking incessantly about it, subtle hints paid off!  I will never stop reading books, because I love the feel of a book in my hand and I love going to the library, BUT it is SOOO nice to have 20+ books at my fingertips while traveling.  I can just stick the nook in my purse and I have books!  No more packing 2, 3, even 4 books when I go somewhere (yes, I read that much, what can I say I love books!  I am reading my 26th book of this year right now...it is a sickness).  Anyway, this is definitely one of the best birthday presents ever and I can honestly say I have used it every day since I got it.  (I can also check email and facebook and even blog from it (although I haven't tried that yet).  Alright I need to wrap this up for tonight I have been waiting to watch Grey's so I didn't have to watch commercials, but now that the house is quiet it is time to watch!

1. illness that passed quickly with Brianna
2. that the illness only really affected her (and me a little)
3. a husband that keeps me on track of keeping this house picked up
4. a husband that definitely does more than his share of the housework
5. snuggling with Brianna today while Bryce napped (even though it only lasted a few minutes)
6. kids riding bikes
7. a weekend with only 1 planned activity
8. a new greys and private practice
9. thoughtful neighbors to seem genuinely sad that we are moving (at some point)(it really is a super neighborhood)
10. that the ones I loved are tucked into bed fast asleep

weekend with friends...

This past weekend I had the opportunity to get together with some great friends from high school.  We try to get together once a year for a girl's day at the spa.  This year it came at the perfect time.  Mom agreed to watch the kids while I went so we drove to Iowa on Thursday and Friday we spent the day with my friend, Jill and her kiddos (who are about the same age as Brianna & Bryce).  The kids had a great time together.  By Saturday morning, however, I was so ready to be off mommy duty for the day.  The spa was fantastic (as always) I just had a pedicure, but the first one of the year is always so great.  I'm definitely ready for spring now!!  After the spa we decided we were going to head out for the night, we went to a bar for a bit and had a great time laughing and catching up.  I really do have some amazing friends, life is just so much more happy and colorful with them in it.

With that...here is my thankful day 16...

1. a productive day at work
2. a short nap after dinner
3. Bob taking over bath duties
4. a dinner I didn't have to cook
5. the sun shining brightly today

thankful day 15...

Whew...I think I'm all caught up with this list.  I will try to post about my amazingly fun weekend with some great friends but for tonight this is all I can manage. :)

1. for the 2 hours of sleep I did get last night amongst the puking of one kid
2. a mostly uneventful drive home today
3. Bob making dinner
4. Bob taking the kids when he got home so I could lay down (see the 2 hrs of sleep above)
5. an easy night putting the kids to bed.

thankful day 14...

1. kids genuinely excited to see me
2. snuggling up with Bryce for a Sunday afternoon nap
3. a mom-made meal (seriously is there anything better?)
4. my kids had fun being babysat by my little cousin (who I used to babysit...I am old!)
5. that my parents let us invade their house for the weekend

thankful day 13...

I'm a few days behind what with traveling and sicklings...but there are still many things to be thankful for, so here we go!

1. the first pedicure of the year
2. old friends
3. laughing so hard you can't breathe
4. feeling right at home with friends you haven't seen in a year (or so)
5. some time to be just "Amber" and not mommy (for a little bit)

thankful day 12...

1. the smell of cookies baking
2. the kids playing nicely together (for now!)
3. a playdate with great friends
4. my parents (for so many, many reasons)
5. Brianna picking out clothes for herself and Bryce (so helpful)

thankful day 11...

(a little late...again!)

1. a fairly uneventful trip to Iowa with the kiddos by myself
2. a funny, sweet conversation with Brianna while Bryce was sleeping in the car
3. whenever Bryce sees someone has a "boo-boo" he runs over to kiss it
4. actually getting packed and out of the house yesterday (it wasn't looking too good for a while)
5. watching Brianna kiss her hand and then touch a picture of her daddy before going to bed last night and whispering "goodnight, I love you and miss you already".  (yes, I almost cried)

thankful day 10...

1. the way the kids hug each other in the morning, genuinely happy to see each other
2. kids sleeping until 8:30/9:00am
3. an early birthday present
4. a dinner filled with smiles and laughter
5. listening to Brianna read a book with her daddy.

After doing this for 10 days it is amazing how easily it is to find things I am thankful for.  Sometimes they are silly and sometimes they make my heart happy and make me tear up...but everyday I am reminded that for the 5 things I write here there are many many more that I don't.  I am a lucky, lucky girl!

zero waste success (sort of)...

Yesterday was Greening Sam and Avery's Zero Waste Day.  I personally took the challenge (because I wasn't with the rest of my family yesterday) and I am happy to say that I did not throw a single thing away yesterday.  We try to recycle as much as we can in this house, but i will admit we are paper product addicts.  Paper plates, napkins and paper towels are staples around here.  I've been trying hard to limit the paper plate use around here and have been mildly successful.  Yesterday I took my pop to work in my reusable cup and even though Bob and the kids weren't going to be home for dinner and I was very tempted to grab something on my way home I thought about how I would have to admit that I threw something away completely out of convenience and laziness, so I decided to have leftovers at home instead.  Thanks Abbie for this great challenge I know I will think more about what we throw away in this house and find ways we can reduce our waste!

thankful day 9...

1. a few hours of quiet before Bob and the kids got home
2. Bob bringing home Julie Ann's frozen yogurt as a surprise (YUM)
3. Mockingjay being available at the library
4. making it through zero waste day with zero waste
5. a very productive day at work

thankful day 8...

Always a day late and a dollar short! :)

1. crawling into bed at 7pm with a book
2. some of my favorite shows on the dvr
3. girl scout cookies (YUM!)
4. watching Bryce shoot baskets and when he almost makes it hearing him say "almost...I try again"
5. seeing Brianna's handwriting on a note that says I love you

thankful day 6 & 7...

Sorry I'm a bit late on these.  It was a crazy weekend on the road.  We traveled to my sister's house for my nephew's 3rd birthday.  We arrived on Friday night about 10:30.  Bryce decided it was good to play until 2am and then I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep at 5:30am.  We spent the morning making his cake and then had a great party (with really yummy food).  It was a whirlwind weekend, but so much fun.  Last night when we got home I was too tired to do much of anything, so I put my computer away, went to bed and read for a little bit and then went to sleep early.  So, after all of that explanation...here is my thankful list for the last couple of days.

1. spending time with family
2. safe travels for my family
3. a good book
4. that my nephews cake turned out pretty good
5. my kids playing with their cousins
6. the kids seeing their great-grandmas
7. lots of laughter
8. my sister
9. beautiful weather
10. a clean house to come home to

thankful day 5...

1. A long car ride to be able to have a real conversation with Bob
2. 2 hours of blissful quiet to end the drive
3. Bryce going pee in the potty today
4. A clean house for a unexpected house showing
5. Cakes that are baked and ready for me to decorate in the morning (thanks sis!)

thursday thanks...

I've been battling a massive headache all day so I don't have anything for you today except this.

1. Bryce giving my head a kiss when I said mommy's head hurt
2. Brianna dancing and singing around the living room
3. Hot showers
4. A dinner without fighting to get the kids to eat (who knew they'd love corned beef?)
5. Watching American Idol as a family and eating ice cream

What are you thankful for today?

wednesday thanks...a little late...

We went to Bob's volleyball game last night so it was 9pm when we got home and by the kids were in bed asleep I collapsed into bed.  So here is yesterday's thankful list.

1. being able to drive with the windows down
2. that the people that looked at our house yesterday showed up at 2 instead of 1:30 so I had 20 minutes to get the house looking presentable
3. that I listened to my voicemail when I did to find out there was a showing so I could clean up some
4. that the kids got to run and play outside yesterday while at grandma and papas
5. that even though Bryce was a bear last night going to bed as soon as he curled up by me he fell fast asleep

garbage and thanks...

Seriously I'm what on my 2nd day of giving thanks and I almost forgot.  Good grief!  My brain is swiss cheese right now so my title is not creative in the least.  But before I get my pjs on and crawl into bed I wanted to update you on my waste for today (it is just mine not everyone in my household since we weren't home together all day) and give you the five things I'm thankful for today.  So here we go...first the garbage...

1. tissue (crazy I never even think about throwing those away)
2. diaper (only 1 because Bryce was only home for the morning)
3. wrapper from the sandwich I had for lunch
4. 2 paper towels
5. convenience store coffee cup
6. candy bar wrapper

Looking at my list almost all of my trash came from using things that are convenient.  Planning ahead on days like these will serve me well in the future.  Normally I don't drink convenience store coffee or eat candy bars, but between jobs today I needed a little jolt.    Like I stated before this is not a typical day (well it is a typical Tuesday, just not a normal day where the kids and I are home all day) for us mostly because none of us were home and I don't know what my kids or husband threw away today, but I guess I have to start somewhere.

Now for my thankful list...

1. convenience store coffee
2. that I don't have to have a bedtime battle tonight
3. that my kids are safe and loved even though they aren't in our house tonight
4. that my in-laws graciously give up Tuesday afternoons/nights and Wednesdays to help us out with childcare
5. that I have readers that care what I'm thankful for
6. and a bonus thing I'm thankful for...spellcheck, because I cannot for the life of me spell convenience!

And with that I am heading to bed!  Until tomorrow friends!

zero waste day...

My friend Abbie over at Greening Sam and Avery is hosting a zero waste day next Tuesday.  Today she is having a "practice" day.  Today write down everything you throw away and then between now and next Tuesday try to figure out how to avoid throwing that same stuff away.  (Go over here to read her idea/details, she is much better at explaining than I am).  I'm going to try to do this.  In the spirit of full disclosure, Tuesdays aren't a typical day around our house because I work and the kids are gone for the afternoon/evening, BUT it is a start.  We will not be able to go completely waste free because Bryce is still in diapers, but maybe it will push me to get him potty trained, lets be honest I'm ready to be done with the diapers.  I encourage you all to try this out, I know I definitely need to be more mindful of what we throw away in this house.  I'll be back later to let you all know what I threw away today! 

monday blessings...

I so badly want to stay positive in this post...I feel like I'm such a whiner sometimes on here, I do realize how lucky I am in my life and everyday I'm thankful for it.  Today was mostly a good day...I would say the good definitely outweighed the bad.  I picked up another night of working for my old boss and potentially a new client to help out with some accounting.  After the repairs we've had to do in the last month the extra income is definitely welcome and appreciated.  I finished up my monthly work that I do for a client in Florida today and it was not as painful as I thought it would be. Then I actually got to do something creative and made some new jewelry for my sister while Bryce was napping and Brianna was supposed to be picking up the downstairs.  I feel good about the things I accomplished today, nothing big, but accomplishments none the less and for that I am grateful. (I guess maybe those positive thinking books I've been reading DO help!)

Writing this made me just have an idea.  Although I am a few days late on starting this I think this year my Lenten promise will be to come here each day and tell you all about the 5 things that I'm thankful for each day.  Maybe it will help me keep things in perspective much more often.  If you want, leave me a comment letting me know what you are thankful for, I would love to hear!  So here it goes for today...

I am thankful for...

1. employers who think enough of me to recommend me to their friends
2. the opportunity to help my family financially anyway I can
3. being able to snuggle with my baby boy and help us both get a few more minutes of sleep
4. a thank you from my kids and husband for making dinner
5. the excitement my baby girl has for learning to read

on the brink...

I am on the brink of complete exhaustion.  (Hi by the way...sorry I've neglected you for the last 6 days).  We spent the past weekend in the Peoria area with our friends Dawn, Chris & Hayden.  It was a much needed break from all things related to this house.  We had such a wonderful time, we went swimming (indoor pool...the warmest one I've ever been in!) and the kids loved it and it completely wore Bryce out.  He fell asleep in my arms before 7pm and he slept the whole night.  Both kids loved playing with Hayden and who wouldn't...he is the sweetest boy!  Bryce kept trying to hug him and Brianna loved playing with him and reading books to him.  It was just an amazingly relaxing day...thank you Miles family!!  On the way back home Sunday my old boss called and asked if I could help her out with a project, not being one to turn down some money at this point (we did just have 2 sizable repair bills in the last month) I said yes.  I headed over to the office at 5 and worked until 11.  Bryce was up Sunday night so I ended up having to sleep (or not sleep as the case may be) on the futon with him.  Tuesday and Wednesday I had my regular weekly work and then Wednesday night I helped my old boss out again until 11pm.  Today I am dragging and the kids have so much energy.  All I really want to do is curl up in bed with a book...but I don't think the kids will let me!  Must run...Bryce is trying to scale the wall right now, the energy of a two year old...if I could bottle and sell it I'd be a very rich woman right now!

brighter...

After yesterday's dramatic post, I feel the need to update you all on the fact that I'm doing much better.  Yesterday afternoon the kids were having hopping races into my arms (I was the finish line) and I felt the pieces go back together.  Let me explain a little about what happened...the injector pump went out in our basement a couple of weeks ago, so that was an unexpected repair (and expense), then this week our microwave died (which again, not a huge deal...just darn inconvenient), then Wednesday our furnace starting acting up.  We slept in a house with no heat that night (thankfully it wasn't too cold, but it was still cold enough).  Yesterday it got fixed, it again was nothing major but another repair/expense we weren't counting on.  Thankfully our furnace is in fine shape and we didn't have to replace it altogether.  Add all of those things onto a very long couple of days of work, putting the house on the market (and considering the market isn't great to begin with), trying to keep the house clean, and only 1 showing...it all gets to a girl you know? 
BUT, having a night home curled up on the couch with Bob and the kids has helped me pull it all together.  I know things will get better, things will work out the way they were meant to and I need to have some patience and trust that when the time is right things will go our way, and along the way I know I have the best friends and family to lean on.  I am such a lucky girl, I am surrounded by love...as long as I always remember that I know that I will always be able to put the pieces back together.

broken...

It inevitably happens, you get a rock to your windshield, a tiny chip in the thick glass.  A nuisance, but nothing to really get bent out of shape about.  You'll get it fixed, no problem...but time and life goes on and you forget, until one day you notice that from that chip there is now a tiny crack.  You again say you'll get it fixed while it is still fixable, while it is still no big deal.  But here comes life again and your tiny chip and small crack get pushed to the back burner yet again.  Suddenly you wake up one day, go out to your car and realize that over time that tiny chip has destroyed your windshield.  Little crack by tiny little crack, your windshield is broken.  All those things that were no big deal...suddenly when put together are a damn big deal. 
I feel like a windshield today, one that has been chipped away at, little crack by little crack. Nothing major is wrong, no catastrophic thing happened.  But today, all of the little things have shattered me.  I am not a positive person by nature, I have to consciously decide that I'm going to look at things on the bright side to find the positive where there seemingly isn't.  But today...today I only see darkness, the bad and the struggles.  Today there seems to be no sunshine or light at the end of the tunnel.  I am (mildly-unsuccessfully) willing the tears not to fall because I don't want the kids to see me broken.   Right now I don't know how to put myself back together. 

for sale...

Our house! Our house is for sale! It has been on the market for a few days now and we are slowly getting the hang of keeping the house clean all the time! This is quite an undertaking for a house with two kids...especially our kids! Other than realizing I'm a complete control freak and do not deal so well with things I have no say in, I am getting a big lesson in patience as well. It has been a rough week but I have faith that everything will work out and someone out there will love this house as much as we have. It is just a house, but so much of our story is wrapped up here. The place we came to when our babies came home from the hospital, where they took their first steps, said their first words...so many memories held forever inside these walls. We have loved it here, but it is time to move on...to find a place to better suit the family we have become. I'm so excited for this next chapter of our lives, but I'm also a little sad to be closing this one. Well...I will be once we actually sell! Right now...anyone want to buy our house? :)

(sorry for any spelling/grammatical errors...I'm writing this on Bob's iPod so give me a little leeway! :)

check me out...somewhere else...

Just popping in quick to say that I'm guest posting over at On My Bookshelf.  I reviewed the new Jodi Picoult book Sing You Home (which hits stores TODAY!) for my sweet friend Holly and it is up!  Go check it out!  And while you're at it, add On My Bookshelf to your regular blog hopping, they always have great suggestions of things to read!!