In general I'm not big on New Year's resolutions. I mean yes, I always have good intentions of starting the new year with a clean slate, I'm going to eat better, sleep more, exercise and in general take better care of myself, and then after a month or so there are a million other things that take priority above taking better care of myself. It is the joyous curse of being a mom. So for the most part I don't make resolutions or I guess to be more honest I make them every day. Every night before I go to sleep, I think over my day, pat myself on the back for the good things I did that day, goals I met or improvements I made and then I think about the parts of my day where I failed or didn't meet my goals and I resolve to start fresh tomorrow, to start the next day with a new slate, to not let my shortcomings defeat me for the coming day.
All of this to say, I don't write down resolutions, but for 2013 I have a resolution that I am going to do my best to work at and improve.
In 2013 I want to be a better friend. I feel like over the last 2 years I have let my friendships slide, hoping they would ride through the storm without the attention and love they need and deserve. I won't apologize for doing what I had to do for the past two years while our whole world was upside down, trying to sell a house in a crappy market, living apart, struggling financially and just trying to keep my head above water and survive. But I do have some regret that I let people I love down, that I maybe wasn't there for them as much as I wanted to be and I didn't tend to my friendships in the way they deserve. I have the very best of friends (some of whom happen to be related to me either by blood or marriage) who love me for who I am, faults and all. In a way I feel like I am missing a part of myself when I don't nurture the friendships that are so dear to me. So, while I'm sure there will be days when I lay my head down on my pillow and know that I wasn't the greatest of friend that day, I will take a deep breath and consciously resolve to do better the next day. Friendships take work and I don't ever want those that mean the most to me to think I take them for granted, I resolve to work at my friendships and to make time for them, because they are important to me. It may be luck that these people happened into my life but it is work, love, caring and time that keeps them here. Thank you for sticking by me for the last 2 years and allowing me the room and love to take more from our friendships than I gave. I love you all! Here is to 2013...full of love, laughter and friends.