Sunday, August 17, 2008

the unappealing part...

I started reading Jodie's blog right after Abbie started her blog (do you see how I started reading so many blogs...it started out so innocently). Anyway, I really enjoy Jodie's blog not only because she is an extremely talented photographer and I love looking at her pictures, but because I admire her honesty when it comes to her three adorable children (who are by the way all aged 3 and under) and life in general.
The reason I bring this all up (I swear I have a point) is because about a month ago, Jodie wrote this post challenging her readers to photograph and blog about the unappealing parts of their lives. The dirty dishes, the laundry laying around...you know, generally the stuff you prefer no one knows about or sees. This is part of the honesty that I love about a great deal of the blogging community.
Anyway, long story short...I never thought I would have the courage to post the "unappealing parts" of my life. But tonight, here it is. While this is not dishes in the sink, laundry, etc. This is the part of my life I don't generally want people to see. I mean, they probably see it, but looking at these pictures side by side is quite a different story.
Are you confused yet? See the most unappealing part of my life has also brought me some of my proudest personal moments over the last year and a half. Anyone that knows me in real life is probably aware of this struggle I have with my weight, while I generally don't openly talk about it, it is always there, in the back of my mind...the "ugly" part of my life. Unfortunately, it infiltrates too much of my life. In an effort to regain some control of the ugly...here it is.


The first picture (red dress) was taken in October of 2006. The second, in November of 2007. And finally the third (black dress) was taken in March of 2008. Obviously, since the last picture I became pregnant and am having a difficult time watching the scale move upward. I know it is necessary, and I know I will regain some control of my body after this baby comes, but somedays that doesn't make it any easier.

That is it, that is my unappealing part (the first picture) and my slow progression to make it not the most unappealing part of my life...I'm guessing it is not exactly what Jodie was thinking when she wrote that post, but it is how I applied it to my life and myself. I'm hoping by putting this out there I can let go of some of the control it has over me.

(told you the tone of some of the posts were going to change :)

Here is to a new week...full of possibilities!







6 comments:

Dawn Miles said...

Good for you for posting the unappealing part! That takes a lot of courage - more than I have for sure. I'm proud of your accomplishments over this last year (but you already know that). Don't let the baby thing get you down - that kid's gotta eat! Love you!

Anonymous said...

Don't ever forget that you ARE an amazing person, even on the days when you don't feel quite as amazing as you would like too....

Anonymous said...

You're amazing! Stay positive! Maybe in the spring we can do a
5K together!

Abbie said...

Way to go! That is amazing and if you can do it once you will be able to do it again after this baby. Be proud of yourself and hold on to that feeling! On another note...where do you get your dresses cause those are SOOOOO cute! I always struggle finding cute dresses that are not totally slutty but don't make me look like a grandma either!

amber said...

Thanks everyone for your nice comments. You guys are the best! :)

Mary~ Definitely...My goal is to do the full Bix next year so a 5K will be great training.

Abbie~The red dress is from JC Penny's believe it or not (probably one of my all time favorite dresses) and the black one I got at Target around Easter-time this year for less than $20! It is kind of low-cut, but I wore a tank under it for Easter, but when I wore it out for my bday I didn't. Its super comfy too!

Jodie Allen said...

Hi! I found your blog from your comment on Abbie's and HOLY COW girl! You look amazing! Gaining/Losing/Gaining weight is one of the hardest parts of being a mom I think and one thing we all struggle with. Thanks for sharing your triumphs! It made me set DOWN the Doritto I was eating and has me THINKING about running tomorrow! :)

Let's be honest, I won't go running, but at least you have me thinking about it!